What Went Wrong Between Kate and Meghan?

Meghan Markle and Kate Middleton were never meant to be best friends — but they weren’t supposed to become a global fascination either. Every smile, silence, and side-step was dissected endlessly. Royal watchers saw poise. The press saw a feud. What really happened? Not even palace protocol could keep this story from slipping out.

Once Upon a Royal Introduction

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In January 2017, Prince Harry introduced Meghan Markle to Kate Middleton. The gift was reportedly a leather planner — thoughtful, symbolic, and quietly setting the tone for their dynamic.

Kate was said to be “very welcoming,” according to Finding Freedom. But the meeting highlighted subtle cultural and personality contrasts that would later become talking points.

Their encounter was brief and polite. Observers later noted this as the moment two very different paths first crossed — not with friction, but certainly with formality.

The Engagement Heard Round the Crown

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Harry and Meghan’s November 2017 engagement announcement brought royal fanfare. Kate publicly called it “really exciting” and said she looked forward to getting to know Meghan better.

The palace’s tone was upbeat, but royal reporters noted a marked contrast between the couples. The Sussexes represented change; the Cambridges embodied tradition and predictability.

As Scobie and Durand wrote in Finding Freedom, some insiders saw Meghan as “a breath of fresh air,” while others struggled with her nontraditional approach.

Holiday Cheer… With Side-Eye

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Christmas at Anmer Hall saw Meghan joining the family for festive celebrations. Photos suggested warmth, but coverage hinted at the beginning of a more complex dynamic.

Finding Freedom describes the mood as “cordial but cautious.” Behind the scenes, etiquette and personality differences created a learning curve for everyone involved.

Gift exchanges and group photos happened as expected. But insiders reported that, while the welcome was official, emotional comfort took longer to develop.

The Fab Four Formation

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On Christmas Day 2017, the press dubbed them the “Fab Four” after the couples appeared together for church in Sandringham, coordinated and camera-ready.

Royal biographers observed that this carefully staged moment was more about image than chemistry. Their appearances suggested alignment; the reality, per Finding Freedom, was more nuanced.

The outing was historic in presentation, but it marked the beginning of public expectation that this foursome would work as one — a prediction that didn’t hold.

Pregnancy, Pep Talks, and Politeness

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As Kate approached the birth of Prince Louis, Meghan reportedly offered wellness advice during visits. Sources quoted in Finding Freedom described the meetings as friendly but formal.

Meghan, still adjusting to royal life, shared tips rooted in her California upbringing. The effort was noted, but not necessarily embraced with enthusiasm.

“There wasn’t tension, just difference,” one aide told the authors. Meghan’s modern approach contrasted with Kate’s more traditional preference for privacy and routine.

A Forum, Four Faces, One Script

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At the February 2018 Royal Foundation Forum, the Fab Four shared a stage for the first and only time. The atmosphere appeared upbeat, though the tone was businesslike.

Harry acknowledged, “Working as a family does have its challenges,” hinting at unspoken tensions. Meghan emphasized shared values, while Kate kept her remarks brief.

The event showcased polite cooperation, but Finding Freedom described the session as more performative than collaborative — a group of individuals rather than a team.

Dresses, Drama, and the Tear-Tally

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Months before the royal wedding, rumors emerged that Meghan had made Kate cry over a bridesmaid dress. Meghan addressed it directly in her 2021 interview with Oprah.

“The reverse happened,” Meghan said. “She was upset about something, but she owned it, apologized, and brought me flowers.”

The press had distorted the story. Meghan added, “I don’t say that to disparage… she’s a good person.” Still, the incident left a lasting impact.

Tennis and Tension in the Royal Box

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In July 2018, Meghan and Kate attended Wimbledon together, marking their first solo outing. The occasion sparked excitement — and subtle commentary on their public dynamic.

Royal reporters noted they were gracious, smiling, and coordinated in appearance. Still, comparisons to Kate’s previous outings with Pippa drew attention to the event’s formality.

Finding Freedom noted that their relationship “hadn’t progressed much.” Public appearances worked, but private connections remained elusive.

Baby Boom and Buzz

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In October 2018, Meghan announced her pregnancy. Kate expressed joy, calling it “really special.” But palace insiders told Vanity Fair the news didn’t bring them closer.

The Cambridges were described as “supportive but removed,” letting the Sussexes handle the spotlight. The physical and emotional distance between them widened.

Coverage increasingly highlighted contrasts in style and presence, adding public pressure to a personal shift already underway behind the palace walls.

Glamorous Nights and Group Poses

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Late 2018 saw the Fab Four reunited at a Remembrance event and a diplomatic reception. Smiles returned — but so did speculation.

Body language analysts dissected the most minor details. Photos were flawless, but Finding Freedom noted that interactions were minimal and occasionally tense behind the scenes.

“They were united in public,” said one reporter. “But backstage, they were clearly in different places.”

Moving Out and Moving On?

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News broke in early 2019 that Harry and Meghan would leave Kensington Palace for Frogmore Cottage. The move sparked rumors of a feud between the duchesses.

Palace officials denied rift claims, calling the move logistical. But The Times later reported “growing tension” and differing visions for their royal roles.

The shift marked the end of their shared residence — and symbolically, the end of any consistent personal contact.

Playing Nice for Christmas Cameras

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In December 2018, Meghan and Kate were seen walking side by side into Sandringham’s Christmas service. Their demeanor was friendly but carefully composed for public view.

Photos captured a brief moment when Meghan gently touched Kate’s back. Body language experts interpreted it as either a supportive gesture or calculated diplomacy — the debate lingered.

According to Finding Freedom, both women made a “genuine effort” to appear united. But insiders agreed it was more optics than true reconciliation.

Festive Honesty, Finally?

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That holiday reportedly featured a candid conversation between Meghan and Kate. Finding Freedom claims both women expressed frustrations about their strained interactions and differing expectations.

Meghan allegedly felt she was treated as an outsider. Kate, meanwhile, was said to feel pressured by constant comparisons and assumptions of competition.

The talk was described as constructive, not confrontational. It didn’t resolve everything, but it was a rare moment of emotional clarity inside an often silent system.

Comparisons Begin, Cameras Roll

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As 2019 began, the British press increasingly drew contrasts between the duchesses, from fashion choices to parenting styles. The scrutiny escalated rapidly and relentlessly.

Meghan later described the media’s tone as unfair. “Not many people have asked if I’m okay,” she told ITV’s Tom Bradby during a tour of Africa.

Meanwhile, Kate maintained silence. Her friends told The Telegraph she was sympathetic but cautious about becoming involved in public narratives.

Not Quite Besties

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By spring, royal reporters were openly noting that Meghan and Kate’s relationship was “not especially close.” Finding Freedom called their bond “more distant than warm.”

The book stated, “They were not at war, but they were not in sync either.” They functioned like polite colleagues rather than friends.

One aide noted their differing personalities. “Kate is reserved. Meghan is expressive. They didn’t clash — they just didn’t click.”

Concern Wrapped in Silence

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Later that year, Meghan revealed in the ITV documentary that she was struggling with royal life. “Any woman, especially when they’re pregnant… it’s a lot,” she said.

Kate’s response was quiet. Sources told Vanity Fair she was “worried” but unsure how to reach out without complicating matters further.

Palace aides later told The Times that the family didn’t know how to respond publicly without escalating the situation. Silence was the default setting.

California Christmas and Sussex Snowglobes

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For Christmas 2019, Meghan and Harry celebrated in Canada, skipping the Queen’s annual gathering. It was their first break from royal holiday tradition.

The decision drew speculation. Was it emotional distance or self-preservation? The Sussexes released a holiday card with Archie — their only public gesture during the period.

Royal aides insisted the Cambridges weren’t offended. But The Telegraph reported it as “another sign” that the couples were now living on separate tracks.

Birthday Blues and Unexpected Moves

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In January 2020, Meghan and Harry announced they would step back as senior royals. The news dropped one day before Kate’s 38th birthday.

The timing surprised many. The Times reported that Kate felt “blindsided” and saddened by the announcement’s abruptness and its effect on the family.

No personal statement was made by Kate. Her public duties continued uninterrupted, but insiders said the mood at Kensington Palace was shaken.

Radio Silence and Royal Cold Front

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By spring, sources confirmed Meghan and Kate were no longer communicating. Finding Freedom described a “polite but distant” relationship, with no direct contact since the split.

The rift between Harry and William reportedly made reconciliation harder. As one aide told The Daily Mail, “Their bond deteriorated through association.”

There were no messages, no public acknowledgments. The silence, by royal standards, was unusually definitive.

Not-So-Common Service

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At the Commonwealth Day service in March 2020, Meghan and Kate reunited publicly for the first time in months. Observers noted the visible absence of interaction.

According to The Guardian, “no greetings exchanged” between the women. The tension was subtle but undeniable—body language said more than words.

Despite the coolness, the event proceeded smoothly. As always, duty came first. Emotions remained offstage.

Books, Bombshells, and Brisk Denials

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That summer, Finding Freedom was released, detailing Harry and Meghan’s perspective. It described Kate as “cooler” than expected, and noted missed opportunities for bonding.

The book revealed Meghan had invited Kate to lunch — an offer that was declined. Palace officials didn’t deny specifics but reiterated the couple had not contributed to the book.

Royal commentators noted that even without formal interviews, the book’s details implied insider input, much of it painting Kate as distant, not hostile.

Oprah, Orchids, and One Explosive Interview

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In March 2021, Meghan told Oprah Winfrey that the crying story had been inaccurately reported. “The reverse happened,” she said. “And she apologized, and I forgave her.”

Meghan added, “She’s a good person,” clarifying that she wasn’t attacking Kate but correcting the narrative. The comment sparked headlines and divided opinion.

Kate never responded publicly. The palace issued a general statement saying, “Recollections may vary,” and emphasized that the matter would be addressed privately.

Communication Cut Off

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Post-interview, Meghan and Kate’s communication reportedly ceased. Harper’s Bazaar reported that Meghan had not received any messages from Kate after the broadcast aired.

Sources close to the palace said the silence reflected William and Harry’s ongoing tensions. The fallout extended into the in-laws’ relationship with little hope of short-term repair.

Insiders said the women weren’t angry—they were simply disengaged. Their roles had diverged, and their bond, already delicate, unraveled further.

A Baby Named Lilibet

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In June 2021, Meghan gave birth to Lilibet Diana. The Cambridges congratulated the Sussexes in a brief Instagram post: “We are all delighted by the happy news.”

People reported that Kate sent a gift and a card. It was a gesture of goodwill that hinted at thawing — even if only momentarily.

Royal experts speculated that the birth of Lili might offer common ground. “Motherhood unites them,” one said. But it didn’t signal a complete reconciliation.

Repair in Progress?

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By summer, whispers of reconnection surfaced. Us Weekly cited unnamed sources claiming the women were “texting” again, albeit infrequently and cautiously.

Kate reportedly hoped to mend things for the sake of the children. Meghan, too, was said to be open — but wary of palace dynamics repeating themselves.

The attempts weren’t dramatic. They were quiet, tentative. But after years of cold civility, even small gestures stood out.

Birthday Wishes, Ski Trips, and Strategic Absences

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For Kate’s 40th birthday in January 2022, Meghan and Harry reportedly reached out privately. While a polite gesture, there was no indication of a deeper rekindling of ties.

Later that spring, Harry and Meghan visited the UK but didn’t meet with William or Kate. According to The Mirror, William was on a ski trip, fueling media speculation.

Insiders described the families as “still figuring things out.” But the lack of face-to-face contact spoke louder than any behind-the-scenes effort.

Jubilee or Just Awkward?

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During the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee in June 2022, Harry and Meghan returned to London. They attended select events, but kept a low profile and didn’t interact with Kate or William.

According to The Times, they were “not invited” to join the working royals on the palace balcony. The divide was ceremonial, visible, and intentional.

The couples were seated apart during the service of Thanksgiving. “It was clear they weren’t close,” said one royal correspondent.

A Funeral, A Flash of Unity

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Following Queen Elizabeth II’s death in September 2022, Meghan and Kate appeared together with their husbands outside Windsor Castle — a rare, somber reunion.

William reportedly extended the invitation to join the walkabout. BBC coverage described the outing as respectful but stiff, with body language revealing lingering discomfort.

The show of unity was more about the Queen than the couples. “It was a truce, not a turning point,” said one palace insider.

Distance, Drapes, and Unspoken Walls

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During the Queen’s funeral procession, Meghan walked slightly behind Kate — a small but symbolic detail. Observers noted the careful spacing and absence of eye contact.

Royal protocol shaped the arrangement, but many also saw it as emotionally reflective. “They were performing tradition, not intimacy,” wrote The Guardian.

There were no public greetings or shared glances. Just poised in silence under black veils and centuries of duty.

The Netflix Effect

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The Harry & Meghan docuseries aired in December 2022. In it, Meghan recalled first meeting Kate while wearing “ripped jeans” and being barefoot — a detail that sparked debate.

“I’m a hugger,” Meghan said. “I didn’t realize that’s really jarring for a lot of Brits.” Her comments were seen as a critique of royal formality.

Royal commentators noted the implications were subtle but clear: Meghan felt unwelcome, and Kate seemed symbolic of that icy reception.

Lip Gloss and Grimaces

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In Spare, Harry described a moment where Meghan asked to borrow Kate’s lip gloss. Kate hesitated but handed it over. Meghan applied it, and Kate “grimaced.”

Harry framed it as awkward, not hostile — “small, but revealing,” he wrote. The anecdote gained attention for showing strained politeness masked by civility.

It wasn’t dramatic. But in royal life, even a shared cosmetic becomes a window into emotional boundaries.

Wedding Rewind, Part Deux

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Also in Spare, Harry revisited the bridesmaid dress episode. Kate was upset over Charlotte’s dress; Meghan became emotional. Eventually, Kate apologized and sent flowers.

“There were misunderstandings,” Harry wrote. “But it wasn’t about cruelty — it was stress.” The moment became a symbol of a wider communication gap.

Despite the apology, the media version stuck: Kate as wounded, Meghan as demanding. The truth, as Harry presented it, was far messier.

Coronation Crickets

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By the time of King Charles’s coronation in May 2023, Meghan stayed in California with the children. Kate attended solo with William, exuding complete royal form.

Reports from The Telegraph suggested Kate had “no interest” in reconnecting with Meghan then. It was cool, deliberate, and quietly final.

Palace aides offered no insight. “Recollections may vary” had become more than a phrase — it was the whole strategy.

The Uncle Who Spoke Too Much

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In March 2024, Kate’s uncle, Gary Goldsmith, appeared on Celebrity Big Brother UK and criticized Meghan, calling her “bad for Harry.” The comments reignited media tension.

No official response came from the palace or Kate. However, commentators said the remarks were “unhelpful” and likely unwelcome at Kensington Palace.

Goldsmith had previously positioned himself as loyal to Kate, but insiders reportedly found his candor “embarrassing.”

Revisiting the Dress… Again

Split image from a royal wedding. On the left, a smiling couple poses with the bride's mother against an ornate green and gold backdrop—the groom in a military uniform, the bride in a sleek white gown and tiara holding a bouquet, and her mother in a pale green outfit. On the right, a woman in a cream outfit and large floral hat sits in a pew, holding a program and looking to the side. — Credit to u/Timbucktwo1230 via Reddit

In 2025, another royal biography rehashed the bridesmaid incident, concluding both women had cried—no villains — just two stressed duchesses in an overpressurized setting.

The new reporting echoed Harry’s version. “They were both under enormous scrutiny,” said a source quoted by The Times. “It was a rough week.”

Despite its clarity, the moment still fuels commentary. The truth—that they both cried—was ordinary. But in the royal world, even shared tears become symbols of fractured bonds.

Prince Harry’s Revelation

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May 2025 brought a candid interview with Harry on the BBC. He confirmed King Charles had stopped communicating. Meghan’s name, however, was noticeably absent, mentioned only in context.

Sources told The Telegraph that Meghan’s name is now a “stress trigger” for palace conversations. Even Kate reportedly finds the subject emotionally charged, prompting staff to carefully avoid it.

There were no royal replies, public or private. The palace chose silence once again — a practiced tactic for containing emotion beneath centuries of ceremonial calm.

Still No Contact

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By mid-2025, multiple outlets confirmed the duchesses had not spoken in over two years. No messages, no calls — not even polite acknowledgements of birthdays, holidays, or family milestones.

One aide described the status as “cordial detachment.” They weren’t angry, but had reached a mutual understanding that no further attempts at connection were needed — or expected.

Their public paths diverged long ago. What remained was a quiet, dignified distance — the kind often mistaken for peace but more accurately described as emotional resignation.

Parallel Lives, Separate Realms

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Kate remains a full-time working royal, representing the crown with consistency and poise. Meghan, across the Atlantic, builds a private identity centered on storytelling, philanthropy, and controlled visibility.

Neither speaks of the other publicly. Their orbits no longer overlap, and no efforts have been made to bridge the growing space between their lives, values, or priorities.

Theirs is no longer a rivalry or rift. It’s a chapter quietly closed — each woman writing her future without need for reconciliation or rekindled connection.

No Royal Playdates

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Despite their children being close in age, the cousins have not visited or shared family moments. Archie and Lilibet have not spent time with George, Charlotte, or Louis.

Royal insiders confirm the families are “not in touch.” The lack of cousin connection mirrors the larger family dynamic — polite, separate, and without current plans to change that.

The result is a quiet absence of shared childhood memories—a byproduct of adult fractures that have yet to be repaired and may never be repaired.

The Myth of the Royal Sisterhood

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The idea of Kate and Meghan as inseparable sisters-in-law was a public fantasy — one that collapsed under the weight of reality, pressure, and institutional limitations.

They were never enemies, but they were never truly close, either. They were two individuals brought together by circumstance, not compatibility, and kept apart by conflicting roles.

The myth endures because it comforts. But their real relationship — polite, complex, and ultimately distant — is far more reflective of life than legend.

The Queen’s Legacy, Still Lingering

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Since Queen Elizabeth’s death, her unifying influence has been sorely missed. The monarch was a stabilizing figure who kept difficult conversations from spiraling or fading altogether.

Kate reflects the Queen’s restraint, discipline, and polished duty model. Meghan chose openness, independence, and reinvention. Their paths, once parallel, now symbolize royal tradition versus personal evolution.

Without the Queen, no one has filled the void — and without her presence, there’s little incentive left to pretend unity where none truly exists.

The End… or Just a Pause?

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Currently, Kate and Meghan live separate lives, with no personal contact or public plans to reconcile. The silence is no longer a Cold War—it’s a resolution.

History has a habit of revisiting broken ties. Maybe time, or children, or circumstance will prompt a future reunion. Or maybe it won’t — and that’s okay.

For now, they continue forward. Apart, quiet, and unburdened by old expectations. The story isn’t unfinished — it’s simply at rest.

Meghan, Kate, and the Lip Gloss Moment That Said Everything — A Timeline of Royal Tension